Month: April 2010

  • Twin Towers to Fall

    Driving is boring. Most billboards are ugly and suck. Mother Nature can get repetitive on a long drive. So roadside attractions like water towers with pithy thought-proving messages are greatly appreciated. Think about this philosophical question–– is Gwinnett great because Success lives here, or does Success live here because Gwinnett is great? Those are two…

  • Monkey Law Enforcement

    Austin, Texas is employing trained monkeys to ‘man’ light poles for keeping law-breaking drivers in line. If a motorist runs a red light, the monkey leaps onto the car and scrambles its way inside the vehicle to gouge the driver’s eyes out and spray the interior with urine.

  • The Dirt On Larry King’s Failed 8th Marriage

    In a Lint Screen exclusive, we reveal the confrontation that took place in the King household on April 15th when Larry sat waiting at the kitchen table as Shawn entered the house from the garage.

  • Lint Turns 100

    Satire is an alien concept to many. Much of what I’ve written in satire. It is sarcastic, ironic, silly smartass stuff that lampoons many of the follies of people in our modern times. But, I’m sad to say, many people have no satirical sense of humor. Too many take everything at face value. It’s a…

  • Citizens Angry Over Census

    Chester Wheelie of Keene, New Hampshire, is also one angry American. “We answer that census, next thing you know the federal government will be sending radio waves to infect our brains making us gover-zombies, begging to pay more taxes, have more socialist entitlement programs and requesting Fluoride in our drinking water. I ain’t falling for…

  • New Tiger Texts Revealed

    Tiger:Sent: 10:06 AM 8/10/2009: I sure do love my wife a whole bunch. Gonna send her flowers, candy, box of diamonds and a luxury SUV with premium sound system. Maybe even a crate of Omaha Steaks!