If one ever wished to be a fly, one would wish to be a fly on the wall when three great talents met: Michael Jordan, Macaulay Culkin and Michael Jackson. In a exclusive scoop, The Lint Screen has acquired a transcript of their 1992 conversation, saving you the bother of being transformed into a fly and going into a time machine (that’s the kind of bennies we give our readers here!).

THE THREE GREATS OF THEIR RESPECTIVE GAMES MET FOR A RARE CONVERSATION AT A PHOTO OP ARRANGED BY THEIR PUBLICISTS IN LOS ANGELES ON JUNE 9, 1992. WHAT FOLLOWS IS THE ENTIRE TRANSCRIPT OF THEIR HISTORIC MEETING AND CONVERSATION. NOTE, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED ON USAGE OF ANY INSIGHTS EXPRESSED.

Jordan: So…
Jackson: Yeah.
Jordan: Right.
Culkin: Yeah. Right.
Jackson: (GIGGLES) You said it.
Culkin: I did.
Jackson: (GIGGLES)
Jordan: Oh, yes, I know you did.
Culkin: I know you know I did.
ALL THREE CELEBRITIES LAUGH FOR 48-SECONDS. LAUGHTER DIES DOWN, FOLLOWED BY AN AWKWARD SIX MINUTES OF SILENCE.

Jackson: Nice weather.
Jordan: You mean today?
Jackson: Yeah. Today.
Jordon: Uh-huh. It is nice.
Culkin: I like sunny days.
Jackson: (GIGGLES) Yeah. Me, too.
Jordan: They’re better than stormy days!
Jackson: I’ll say!
ALL THREE CELEBRITIES LAUGH FOR 21-SECONDS. THE LAUGHTER DIES DOWN, FOLLOWED BY A SOMEWHAT AWKWARD TWO MINUTES OF SILENCE.

Jordon: Well, this has been fun.
Culkin: I’ll say. Lots of fun.
Jackson: A blast!
Jordon: Let’s stay in touch.
Jackson: Absolutely.
Culkin: Yeah.
Jordan: You guys take care.
Culkin: You, too.
Jackson: Play basketball! (GIGGLES)
Jordan: It’s what I do.
ALL THREE CELEBRITIES LAUGH FOR 6-SECONDS. LAUGHTER DIES DOWN. SHUFFLING OF FEET AS VARIOUS PUBLICISTS ESCORT CELEBRITIES AWAY.

And… scene!