A plea to these two fine men.

An impassioned plea to these two fine men to settle their differences rationally.

The Lint Screen has learned that Floyd Mayweather, Jr. is scheduled to fight Manny Pacquiao tomorrow in what many are calling “The Fight of The Century”–– and we are worried sick.

In the interest of humanity, TLS is offering $10 (an Abe per-man) if they lay down their gloves and shake hands.

We believe there is too much violence in this world and that canvas should be used for painting pony and rainbows, not splattering with blood, mucus and sweat.

We want you two guys to sit down and rationally discuss any conflicts you may have. We are happy to monitor and referee your spirited debate.

Please, gentlemen, settle your disputes like proper gentlemen!

If you do fight tomorrow night, Mr. Mayweather, we’d appreciate your taking a dive in the eighth round. We’ll make it work your while (a crisp Jackson!).

Thank you.