Month: November 2016

  • Facebook To Stop Fake News And “Like” Accuracy

    Today, Facebook Chairman and CEO Mark Zuckerberg vowed that the popular site he founded would immediately eliminate any ‘fake news’ posted in its digital space. Zuckerberg made the announcement immediately following his solo performance of Man of La Mancha at The Kennedy Center. He played to a packed house of unicorn farmers who are divorced…

  • ‘The Situation’ Pondering Political Career

    Look out Donald, there’s a creature coming from the sea who may take you down! After witnessing the incredible success Donald J. Trump has had in politics, Mike ‘The Situation’ Sorrentino of Jersey Shore fame is thinking he may campaign to be the next president of these United States. “Hey, why not?” the charismatic mensa…

  • Thanksgiving Canceled Due To Potential Bloodshed

    Now that the dust has settled over the 2016 presidential election, it appears a wounded nation will not heal quickly as President Obama has officially canceled the traditional Thanksgiving holiday for all Americans. The president’s statement declared: “If a lot of folks are going to be sad and crying in their mashed potatoes, or gloating,…

  • Nation Grips For Post-Election Depression

    The Lint Screen spoke with noted psychologist Dr. Samuel Hummtin. “The problem is Americans are by nature a competitive people, and as such, they enjoy the spirit of good sportsmanship. The idea that citizens only get a 600-700 election cycle is troubling. That’s a mere two billion dollars in advertising and trillions of dollars in…