The Lint Screen

Tag: presidential debate

  • Candidates To Wear Electric Debate Collars

    “We’ve seen Hillary and Donald square off, and it was ugly,” said Emily Tortsover, the head of the debate organizer committee. “And last night, we witnessed the Tim and Mike show, and it was an awful affair. Their behavior was completely unacceptable. We’ve tried rewarding candidates with treats for good behavior, but that doesn’t seem…

  • Presidential Debate Questions Not Asked

    In last night’s second Presidential Debate, a group of 80 undecided voters gathered in a town hall setting at Hofstra University. They came with questions for President Barack Obama and G.O.P. challenger Mitt Romney. Many questions were asked and answered– or used as tees for well-rehearsed talking points. But what of the questions left un-asked?…

  • Non-Human Debate Ends Tragically

    Last night, Dr. John Doolittle moderated the first ever presidential debate with exclusively non-human candidates, and the broadcast which aired on Animal Planet attracted viewership numbers to rival Dancing With The Stars or American Idol. The debate panel consisted of adorable puppy, Santy Paws, lovable monkey, Ms. Pickles, and colorful character, Carl The Chameleon. Because…