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BP Says Millions Spent Is Plugging Image Hole
Officials at BP today reported they are achieving excellent results from the over $100 million it has spent on advocacy ads to blunt its negative image following the Deepwater Horizon explosion and oil spill. “We’re quite pleased with the results our corporate ads have had,” said Tim Jourdinky, Minister of Corporate Propaganda. “After our little…
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Rejected BP Scripts
Recently, BP launched an extensive media blitz to reassure Americans that it is dedicated to cleaning up the mess it has made in the Gulf of Mexico. The spokesman for the TV campaign is the company’s chief executive officer, Tony Hayward. The Lint Screen has obtained some early drafts of scripts allegedly penned by the…
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BPTV Launches
There was one surprising silver lining on the black oil cloud of the recent failure of BP’s “Top Kill” effort– the live camera feed of the oil leak disaster drew millions of curious viewers from around the world. The viewer response was so strong, BP has decided to launch the live camera feed as a…
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BP Says “Whoopsie!”
An anonymous spokesperson for BP has confessed that the gigantic oil company responsible for the catastrophic Gulf of Mexico oil spill, “was never very good at math.””Originally we thought the oil spill was only 5,000 barrels of oil a day, which is only like, what, 210,000 gallons? No biggie. But we looked again recently and…