Tag: Tony Hayward

  • Hayward: Headhunter Catnip

    Now that BP has officially decided to dump CEO Tony Hayward almost 100 days following the Deepwater Horizon catastrophic oil spill, the British executive is updating his resume and preparing to attack the job market. “I reckon the world will be my oyster,” said a confident Hayward sipping champagne from a 24-Karat solid gold jewel-encrusted…

  • Rejected BP Scripts

    Recently, BP launched an extensive media blitz to reassure Americans that it is dedicated to cleaning up the mess it has made in the Gulf of Mexico. The spokesman for the TV campaign is the company’s chief executive officer, Tony Hayward. The Lint Screen has obtained some early drafts of scripts allegedly penned by the…