The Lint Screen

Month: March 2010

  • My Idyllic Nun

    As a kid, I attended St. Patrick’s Elementary School in Hubbard, Ohio. My uniform was sharp-creased navy blue dress pants with a crisp white shirt and clip-on tie. We had ‘lay teachers’ (ordinary civilians), but we were also taught by ruler-wielding nuns who smacked palms into submission. The pain told the brain and body to…

  • Tiger Picks Jesse For Masters

    Many people were not surprised when it was announced that Tiger Woods would play in the upcoming Masters Golf Tournament, but the latest Tiger news may stun the world off its ever-loving spinning axis: Tiger has selected Jesse James as his official ‘Wingman’ during his Augusta stay.

  • Cute Kitten Wants All

    Snowpuff, quite possibly the cutest kitten to ever grace a litter box, has great ambition intertwined with her adorability– she wants to rule the world! And it’s working. People across the globe are selling their possessions and donating their money to Snowpuff.

  • King Kid Leo

    His given name is Lawrence Travagliante, a mouthful for sure, and the kind of name that’d bust the bank if you were printing softball jerseys. But millions of rock fans know him as Kid Leo, the greatest rock DJ of all time in the opinion of this half-deaf boomer.

  • ’tis The Luck of The Irish

    Yes, you can taste tears in Guinness.

  • Al-Cowda Threat Level Raised

    The nation is girding its collective loins in response to new reports from The National Security Agency that Al-Cowda is posing an serious threat to the United States. The NSA has raised the security threat level from cool ‘n creamy soft amber to hot, radient pink.