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Trump Wants “Very Tough Prosecution” For Individual 1
Donald J. Trump is a man who deeply believes in justice and the rule of law. He came by The Lint Screen offices to discuss his views. “I’m someone who wants to right wrongs,” the president said. “Last week’s testimony from Cohen was nothing but a bunch of lies. Cohen should go to prison for…
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Sessions Pursuing Career In Pornography
Match Game host Gene Rayburn famously said, “A door opens, you get kicked out that door, it slams behind you, but the door to a new world of opportunity opens up. That’s some crazy f’in sh*t!” Witness former Attorney General Jeff Sessions. The diminutive pilot fish was recently killed by his shark, but he lives…
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Troops Deployed From Border To Forests
President Trump sure knows how to be commander-in-chief! After deploying over 5,000 troops to the southern United States border for protection against the horrendously dangerous caravan, the Big Fella made an executive decision to send the soldiers out west and is putting them on clean-up duty instead. “The president wants to stop all the western…
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Florida Dems Disclose Their Secret to Winning Elections
Our nation is decidedly behind glorious leader Donald J. Trump and his agenda for making America great again. The red wave in the midterm elections proves it! Yet, the cheating Democrats won’t surrender. Using the same tactics the looney liberals deployed in cheating President Trump of the popular vote in 2016, the sly Dems used…
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Trump Blames God For World Problems
The president made it clear today he doesn’t care how powerful you are–– if you refuse his “embrace” you are in serious trouble. Today Donald Trump called The Lint Screen and began an epic rampage against God The Almighty. “Look, I like God,” Trump said. “He’s a good guy, good work ethic. Did some amazing…
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Meet Matt Whitaker, A Fair & Balanced A.G.
Now that the disloyal dwarf Jeff Sessions has resigned as Attorney General, President Trump has named Matthew G. Whitaker acting A.G. The Lint Screen met with Mr. Whitaker as he was working out at a local gym. Here is our exclusive interview. TLS: Congratulations, Mr. Whitaker, on becoming the acting Attorney General. MGW: There’s no…