PD Scullin

Convicted sex offender and G.O.P. presidential candidate Donald J. Trump got his “groove on” last night at a Town Hall in Pennsylvania, and it was so exciting that people fainted. “I’m like The Beatles,” Trump tells The Lint Screen. “But I’m much more popular than they were. Sorry, John, Paul, George, and Bingo, Trump’s got … Read more

With the election less than a month away, disgraced ex-President Donald Trump is hot on the campaign trail. Although he’s already been impeached twice, the felon wants to raise his record stats for being a crook and cheat in the Oval Office. At a recent rally in Pennsylvania, the demented kook was joined on stage … Read more

GOP Vice Presidential candidate JD Vance got all gussied up this week for his debate with everyman Democratic V.P. nominee Tim Walz. Vance even went to Sephora for some new Lancôme mascara and eyeliner for the special occasion. His sugar daddy, Peter Thiel, bought him a brand new tailormade Italian suit costing $4,800. Walz bought … Read more

Felonious Trump is at it again. The man behind countless scams and grifts promises that if elected, he will be the country’s “FIRST ALL CAPS PRESIDENT.” What does that mean? The Lint Screen recently exchanged messages with the criminal on his social media scam, ironically called Truth Social. A transcript follows. TLS: Tell America why … Read more

Crazy conspiracy theorist Laura Loomer has been the recent sidekick of felon GOP presidential candidate disgraced twice-impeached ex-President Donald J. Trump. They sat in The Lint Screen offices and discussed the importance of the 2024 election. “If I don’t get elected, this country is over,” the man in the red MAGA hat said. “Everyone will … Read more

Disgraced ex-President Donald J. Trump thinks tonight’s debate will prove his qualifications for a return to The Oval Office. “Look at me,” he told reporters. “I’m a giant. I must be 7′ 10” tall—maybe eight or nine feet. I could play in the NBA if they didn’t have a race restriction. And how tall’s Kambalalaloo? … Read more