The Lint Screen

Man Bored By Meeting

Written by

PD Scullin

in

In a stunning development, M. Carl Hurlybubb of Decatur, Georgia, reports he recently participated in a business meeting that he found “boring.”

Occupational hazard: boredom leads to naughty barnyard animal thoughts.
“My team gathered to touch base and get in the loop with one another. Our deliverable was to spitball some ideas and think outside the box to generate some win-win situations that we could later take offline and leverage to reap the rewards of maximizing potential ROI opportunities. Bottom line, at the end of the day was that right, wrong or indifferent, we were looking to have some positive impact vis a vis our business situation and be able to apply some metrics to their success in the consumer centric marketplace. Our intent was to go the extra mile and create some synergies that could be baked into fast tracking positive results that might advance the ball and move the chains so we could eventually put some points on the board. Unfortunately, though, I was not able to track with all the varied dialogue around the subject and became bored in hour seven of our nine hour pow-wow. I felt awful about that.”

Mr. Hurlybubb reports he “doodled” and allowed his mind to wander during the meeting. “I confess I imagined some of my team members to be disrobed and acting like certain breeds of barnyard animals. I’m not proud of this. I’m afraid I lost focus and let my team down.” He promised to do better in the future.

Comments

8 responses to “Man Bored By Meeting”

  1. Zelda Avatar
    Zelda

    Congratulations, Pat! I believe you have included every business cliche I have ever heard, in this amusing tale. And speaking of tails, certain breeds of barnyard animals have been known to wag them, all the way home.

  2. admin Avatar
    admin

    Thanks for your animal insights and kind words. I tried to use more cliches than you can shake a stick at.

  3. Kitty Avatar
    Kitty

    I interfaced with my critical colleagues on this matter, and we “net-netted” that you’re cute, but kind of a perve.

  4. Patrick Scullin Avatar
    Patrick Scullin

    So you think being a perve may be a core competency? I feel shame…

  5. Kitty Avatar
    Kitty

    Am I gonna have to wup the Catholic out of you? (Rhetorical. Please don’t ask Mistress Kitty to grab her whip.)

  6. Patrick Scullin Avatar
    Patrick Scullin

    Whoa, nellie! We’re getting into quicksand here…

  7. Colonel Avatar
    Colonel

    Drink more coffee and really start contributing at those meetings. I also find it keeps them interesting by occassionally making soft discrete “chirping” sounds and looking under the table. Hell we reorganized twice again this afternoon and its only Thursday this week.

  8. admin Avatar
    admin

    Good suggestions, Col. Beats the chewing on thumbtacks to stay awake approach.

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