The Lint Screen

Watson Enters Race

Written by

PD Scullin

in

,

The 45th president of the United States of America. Who is Watson?
Recently it was rumored that a new candidate would enter the 2012 presidential election race, but all the wild speculation about ghosts, brooms and aliens were wrong. The new candidate has announced his plans to seek the Oval Office, and he speaks pretty funny– because he’s not even a human being!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, the new candidate is none other than Watson, the super brainiac computer built by IBM to win game shows.

The Chester A. Arthur robot

“Watson’s entering the race is a real game changer,” said noted political analyst, C. Henrick Taddlewhacker. “Watson is a proven competitor. If Brad Rutter or Kyle Jennings were running, the smart money would be on Watson. I don’t see any human or nonhuman candidates who can challenge his enormous intellect. He would be the first computer president since the Chester A. Arthur robot served from 1881-1885. While the Arthuratron 6000 had a serviceable intellect, Watson is far, far superior. However, I must say that the Chester A. Arthur robot was exceptional in the whisker-growing department. Watson’s biggest challenge will be trying to communicate without stating everything he says in the form of questions. That could get irritating, unless he’s talking with Alex Trebek.”

No other presidential candidate has commented on this latest entry into the race.

Comments

6 responses to “Watson Enters Race”

  1. Kitty Avatar
    Kitty

    My scanner alleges Watson’s college behavior left her with his replicas all over the Silicon Valley. And did he ante up a bit? Gloria Allred is said to be representing a couple of hot little printers with the same story. Stay tuned. . .

  2. admin Avatar
    admin

    Ms. Kitty, if what you have heard is true, Watson may go by the wayside quickly– unless he also sired the vote tabulation computers…

  3. Kitty Avatar
    Kitty

    How quickly your mind computes. My scanner is enamored.

  4. admin Avatar
    admin

    Does your scanner like humans with artificial hips?

  5. Kitty Avatar
    Kitty

    You’re already married. I’m keeping my slutty little scanner away from you. And, yes, to the hip thing. The machine-y-er, the better.

  6. admin Avatar
    admin

    Fine by me. Scanners tend to be too judgmental, they just see things as they are with no imagination.

    Tell your scanner I’m off limits.

    So, uh, do you have a digital printer? One that does color…

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