President Barack Obama is on a roll. After announcing his plan to change the name of Alaska’s Mt. McKinley to Mt. Denali, The Lint Screen has learned he has other name changes he’ll soon put in place.
The Washington Monument will soon be renamed Pointy Cement Skyscraper.
The Statue of Liberty will carry the moniker Liberty Insurance’s Logo Lady.
The Jefferson Memorial will be called Mr. Fancy Pants Cabana.
Gettysburg National Military Park will have a new moniker playing off Obama’s favorite Beatles song, Bloody Fields Forever
Mount Rushmore will be known as FaceHenge.
The Lincoln Memorial will be renamed Abe’s Chill-A-Torium.
Golden Gate Bridge will be known as McKinley’s Land Connector (as an appeasement to Ohioans cheesed-off with his Mt. Denali decision).
The Liberty Bell gets a new name that’s an homage to one of the president’s favorite TV shows–– The Big Clang Theory
A White House spokesman said there may be some who are upset at these decisions, “But so what? Who’s going to question the guy who lives in The Snow Palace. By the way, that’s the new name for the White House.”