Now that Jeb! has officially sat on the sidelines of the 2016 Presidential race, his running mate ! has decided to go it alone.
“! really feels like it has a real shot,” a spokesperson told The Lint Screen. “! is the most energetic and qualified punctuation mark in the English language, and has as much political experience as some of the other candidates. ! is pretty pumped to serve in the White House and lead America, which it plans to rename AMERICA! That’s a position no red-blooded American can oppose.”
The spokesperson asked to remain anonymous for fear of retribution and nasty Tweets.
Early polling shows ! beginning to surge.
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