While the human race is in a lather over the United States presidential race, a recent survey conducted by The Lint Screen shows the pet population is sick and tired of it.
“It’s stupid,” said Bowser, a four-year-old boxer in Boston. “I swear, it’s all the news has been about for like three years now. When in the hell is this big deal election anyway? Could we just stop this madness already?”
Cotton, a sixteen-year-old tabby cat in Los Angeles, agreed the election is horrible. “It’ll just be another two-legged sweet talker spouting lies and wearing clothes, clothes that would look better with some cat fur on them.”
Even Ms. Pickles, an eight-year-old parrot in Carbondale, Illinois, thinks this election is boring. “It’s just a meat puppet popularity contest. This Polly don’t want a cracker–– this Polly wants the TV remote! Let’s see what’s on TLC–– enough already!”
Perhaps Honeypot, a two-year-old cat in Canton, Ohio said it best. “I could care less who wins. Who’s going to feed me? That’s all I want to know, I’m hungry over here. Meow, already!”
Be advised: please refrain from showing your pets any election news.