Brownoser Sen. Lindsey Graham says he is outraged by the audacity of The Justice Department in seizing records from disgraced twice-impeached ex-President Donald J. Trump’s tacky Mar-a-Lago.

“If Merrick Garland tries to enforce his silly laws,” Graham tells The Lint Screen, “there will be hell to pay. Trump supporters aren’t going to stand for it. And neither am I! He’s Donald Trump, our Chosen One. The laws of mortal men do not apply. If they try and prosecute Trump, it will lead to armageddon and some very upset people.”

Graham sees a double standard between the treatment of Hillary Clinton’s emails and Trump’s top secret documents he stole and hid in Mar-a-Lago.

“We investigated Hillary 2,341 times for her emails,” he says. “Why isn’t she in prison? Oh, that’s right. The stupid justice system said we didn’t prove any ill intent. Well, maybe Trump just accidentally took the files. It could happen. Or, David Copperfield made them appear out of nowhere. You don’t know what magicians are capable of.”

The spineless toady believes President Biden and the Democrats have a vendetta against Trump by continually enforcing laws.

“They hate what Trump and the GOP stand for,” Graham said. “We believe in law and order, women’s rights, keeping our schools safe by rewriting history and banning books, own lots of guns––especially AR-15s, say what you like as long as we like what you say, and always telling the truth. And Garland should back off before he stirs a hornet’s nest.”

Graham pulls this reporter aside. “Please tell Trump what I said. He’ll love it. He’s so dreamy. I just want to crawl into his lap.”

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Enjoy PD Scullin’s debut novel “SAWDUST: Love is wilder than a circus,” a humorous romp across America with a circus in the early ’80s. Also available in audiobook. Click here for a helluva fun ride. Buckle up and go.