RFK Jr. was recently served a heapin’ helpin’ of humble pie by his ruthless master, autocrat-elect Donald J. Trump.
Trump has nominated Robert F. Kennedy Jr. as the incoming Secretary of Health and Human Services. Shortly after making the announcement, RFK trashed the ex-president’s eating habits.
“President Trump eats crap nonstop,” Kennedy said. “His diet is horrible. I think I can get him to eat healthier. Maybe some tofu, organic lettuce, and a side of bear cub.”
When Trump heard about what Kennedy said, he replied, “We’ll see about that.”
The pack of sycophants surrounding Trump egged him on.
“Break him, Pops!” said firstborn son Don Jr. “Destroy him good!”
“I love everything you say and do, sir,” Mike Johnson said. “I love you more than God. More than my wife and kids!”
“Make that sanctimonious bastard squirm,” Elon Musk cheered. “Teach him what happens to opposing views. Obedience is critical. He must be severely punished.”
With the support of his bootlicking cheerleader squad, Trump ordered bags of McDonald’s food brought to his plane and served.
“I used to work at McDonald’s,” Trump bragged. “I worked like a dog. I can’t have anyone trashing Mickey Dee’s.”
RFK Jr. looked apprehensive about eating chicken nuggets and fries and drinking a Coke.
“Could I please get a small salad with a brain worm instead?” he asked timidly.
“No!” Trump barked. “Eat your damn food, maggot! Or I’ll eat your lunch.”
“Yes, Master.” The anti-vaxxer said, apprehensively taking a small bite of a chicken nugget and chewing. “Oh my God,” he said. “That’s so incredible.” He scarfed down all the nuggets, washed them down with half a bottle of Coke, and emptied fries into his gaping mouth.
“Slow down,” Don Jr. said.
“No. Must have more!” RFK Jr. then proceeded to eat everyone’s meal except Donald Trump’s food. He had told the Secret Service to shoot Kennedy if he dared to touch his meal. “Yum-yum,” RFK Jr. said. “Let’s get some D.Q. for dessert!”
“No dessert, Bobby––not until you eat your KFC,” Trump said as buckets of greasy fried chicken were delivered.
“Um-um,” the Kennedy outcast said. “Eat ’em up! Me love grease!”
——————-
Enjoy PD Scullin’s debut novel, “SAWDUST: Love is Wilder than a Circus,” a twisted, funny ride across America with a traveling circus in the early 1980s. The book is also available as an audiobook. Buckle up and go.
Leave a Reply