The internet was created over 20 years ago, providing a canvas for millions of websites and billions of pages. In its history, there was one thing you could always count on with 100% certainty– absolute truth and accuracy.
That may no longer be the case!
Sir Reginald Highphatt, a British scientist, recently made a startling discovery: a fact that was in fact not a fact. “I was chagrined,” said the esteemed learned man, “I was simply astounded and, dare I say, flabbergasted to discover an inaccuracy.”
What was the falsehood? An alleged playlist from Sir Winston Churchill’s iPod.Was he really into Wham, Steppenwolf and Jay-Z?“When I first encountered this, I thought it seemed rather suspect, after all, Churchill was hardly a music lover. He once attended an orchestra performance and had all its members slaughtered to, I quote, ‘stop the infernal caterwonking!’ But what really titillated my investigatory senses was the first three choices on the Prime Minister’s alleged playlist: ‘Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go’ by Wham, ‘The Pusher’ by Steppenwolf and ‘Run This Town’ by Jay-Z. I had a hard time believing Churchill could be into Steppenwolf, and especially not ‘The Pusher’— ‘Magic Carpet Ride’, maybe, but the extended play of ‘The Pusher’ is for the most ardent of fans only.”
And so, Sir Highphatt began some extensive research and discovered a few startling things:
1. Churchill died before the invention of the iPod
2. See above
3. Ditto
“As much as it pains me to say,” the downcast scientist said, “I’m afraid we will no longer have 100% assurance that everything you read on the internet is the God’s honest truth and beyond reproach. Pity, that. I use it as research tool for all my papers and books.”
Be aware: some things on the internet may not be true! Yipes!
Behind the writing of every great book there is a great story.
“Beowulf” was written by some drunk dude following a Steppenwolf concert in the year 942.
“On The Road” was written on Route 66 by Jack Kerouac, who was allegedly hit 136 times by passing cars.
Charles Dickens wrote “A Tale of Two Cities” in Minneapolis and St. Paul holding his fountain pen in the toes of his right foot. The original title was “A Tale of Twin Cities & Terribly Painful Toe Cramps”. His publisher made him change both the title and the plot significantly.
Today I share a few entries from a book I wrote in the mid-late 80’s entitled “The Parking Lot Letters (One Man’s Pursuit of Quality Parking)”.
The book has been published by various copy machines I have known over the years. The idea for the book began when the parking lot management company I used when employed by Bozell, Jacobs, Kenyon & EckhardtAdvertising in Dallas (Las Colinas, actually, a business person’s Disney World) raised their monthly rates. Everyone at the agency bitched and moaned about this action. I decided to take a different tact.
I became a champion of all things related to parking. With every monthly parking payment check I sent, I would include a personal letter written to the “Letter Opening Department” of the parking lot management company. I designed my own visually arresting letterheads. The voice of the letters was an obsessive, passionate fan of parking, and my particular parking lot. Early letters featured arbitrary underlining of words– just because it tickled me.
Later letters got more fantastical and deeper into the character’s psyche. Obsessive anything is always fun.
For two years I wrote these good people my manic letters. Then, I left that job to pursue quality parking elsewhere. Free parking! Did I ever hear from them– the parking lot people? Yes, I did get one letter toward the end of my run, but I suspect it was a prank written by someone inside the agency. It was too hip, too inside, too too.
A few months after I left, a friend went into the parking lot management company office to pay his bill. He told me he saw one of my letters posted on the wall. He asked about the letter and reported the parking lot management guy said he hadn’t heard from me in awhile… and that he really missed my letters. When I heard this, I balled like a baby.
Enjoy these nibbles, feel free to share your favorite parking stories, and may all your parking spots be W I D E !
