Month: June 2009

Did ASO Kill GM?

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In 1998, we made a bold decision. We took a stand that was so radical, so revolutionary, so completely counter-culture, it shook the marketing world like Jello on a jackhammer. We decided to plant our feet firmly and declare accounts we would not work on– refusing easy money on strong principles.

Pre-K Commencement Address

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Recently I was asked to give the commencement address to “The Cherished Sweet Angels Pre-K” graduating class. Here’s my speech in its entirety with editorial comments:

Good morning, Cherished Sweet Angels, and congratulations on receiving a sheepskin for doing little more than poking straws into juice boxes and for rarely mistaking glue sticks for ChapSticks. (TITTERS OF NERVOUS LAUGHTER FROM PARENTS AND CHILDREN.) For these incredible accomplishments we are gathered to honor and blow smoke up your graduation gowns. (ANGRY STARES FROM PARENTS. CHILDREN LOOK BORED.)