Mr. Tuggles, an adorable mixed breed feline, is said to be contemplating declaring his candidacy in the 2012 presidential election race. Although the kitten is not close to 35 years old, a Constitutional requirement for serving as a U.S. President, his handlers say that he has the maturity and wisdom of a 55-year old human. “Plus, I know for a fact that Mr. Tuggles was born in this country because I saw it with my own two eyes– why, it happened right there, under the sink,” said Roger Bimplow who resides in the house with the cuddly furrball of love.
Jerry Ossenwold, an advisor close to Mr. Tuggles, says that he believes the kitten will be a very strong presidential contender. “No one can match him for adorableness and fluffability, and I believe those are the things all Americans are looking for in today’s bleak economy. Mr. Tuggles also does not believe in science, mathematics, art, history or biology. In fact, he told me that he thinks too much book learning and self expression is destroying the world. I agree!”
Ossenwold would not disclose which political party Mr. Tuggles is associated with, but said that he has already been approached by many corporate lobbyists bearing catnip and saucers of milk to curry the cute kitten’s political favor.
“Should he run, I believe Mr. Tuggles will be hard to beat. He’s just so darn lovable, he’ll win paws down!” said the chubby political adviser as he rolled on the lawn and asked for his belly to be rubbed vigorously.
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