Money Floodgates Ready To Bust

Comments

16 responses to “Money Floodgates Ready To Bust”

1. 

   March 22, 2012

   Kitty

   I hear they had an early corner on the fringe market. Some say Cylde liked the way it sorta rubbed up against him, unlike righteous Rebecca.
2. 

   March 22, 2012

   admin

   Fringes are the devil’s tools. I suspect Clyde is merely testing his fortitude.

   At least I hope he’s not some sort of “fringe freak” deviate!
3. 

   March 22, 2012

   Curvin ORielly

   With the minimum standards implicit in the name of the Hundsinger’s Super PAC, “Citizens For A Decent, Celibate And Righteously Moral Future,” I’ve got a feeling that their money won’t fly out the door all that quickly.

   Imagine being a bright, telegenic, modern nonhuman or human candidate faced with the task of sitting in their kitchen to discuss the issues of the day.

   Would they understand the jibber jabbers, barks, squeaks, meows, chirps, etc. of nonhuman candidates?

   And would the words that human candidates use cut it with the Hundsingers? Would the piety of a candidate’s religious beliefs come through and would it be accepted? Would the candidate’s feeble admissions of human frailty (lust in at least one case, power in all cases) square with the Hundsinger’s worldview? Would the beady, suspicious eyes of the Hundsingers, especially Rebecca’s, see through the stump speech pitches candidates use to explain their policy beliefs?

   Yep. The money’s safe. No nonhuman or human will get it.
4. 

   March 22, 2012

   admin

   Curvin, I agree the Hudsingers do not look like people who will part with a buck easily, but I think they will gladly fork over whatever funds it takes to get the right RIGHT candidate into the oval office.

   No candidate may fully fit the bill, but the Hudsingers will surely foot the bill to buy themselves a puppet mouthpiece for their moralistic views.
5. 

   March 22, 2012

   Curvin ORielly

   If the Hundsingers/Hudsingers are looking for a good spokesweasel for their preferred right RIGHT candidate, you’d be doing them and me a big favor by bringing up my name. For one thing, I’ve recently grown a beard similar to the one Clyde has in the photo. So they’d feel comfortable meeting me. Moreover, I’ve adopted a sourpuss expression almost as dour as Rebecca’s. Believe me, it takes a lot of practice to look that glum 24/7. My clothing is more modern that the things they’re wearing in the photo, but I’m sure I could find a few things from the late 19th century at my local Salvation Army store. Unless, that is, there’s been a recent run on fashions from that era. What would my services cost? Not much. Not much at all. All I need is a cashier’s check somewhere in the high five figures, plus out-of-pocket expenses, e.g., horse and buggy, etc. As for what I’d say on behalf of the right RIGHT candidate, all I’d need is a script listing everything they’d like to hear on the campaign trail.
6. 

   March 23, 2012

   admin

   You would have to run against the other human candidates, and they all have their sugar daddies and mamas lined up. If the Hudsingers are ready to play with the big dogs, they may take you on as their spokesweasel.

   I have a slogan you may wish to consider:
   “O’RIELLY?
   O’REALLY!!!!”

   Note the use of four exclamation points. Ordinary copy monkeys would stop at one or three, but I go for the glory!
7. 

   March 23, 2012

   Curvin ORielly

   Four exclamation points? That’s the difference between us. I would have stopped at three.
8. 

   March 23, 2012

   admin

   I used to stop at three, but then I found a way to make my exclamation REALLY make a point: four!!!!
9. 

   March 25, 2012

   mike

   Wow, that last guy with the funny looking picture really makes a strong point. I just think he’s one of those climb-up-on-the-table-and-give-a-“don’t give up!”-speech (how’s that for advanced grammer?!) guys.

   For those keeping score at home, that was: nine hyphens, a quote, an parenthesis, and a “?!” thing.

   Take THAT four exclamation points!!!!!
10. 

    March 26, 2012

    admin

    Mind yourself, lest I unleash the semicolon and long dash.

    But I do admire your punctuation mastery, Mike. Nice work!!!!!
    (Yes, that was five!!!!!!)
11. 

    March 27, 2012

    Curvin ORielly

    Where I come from, you have to pay for exclamation points, so I limit myself to just three. If you guys are going to up the ante, I’ll have to check my stack of chips and see if I can stay in the game.
12. 

    March 27, 2012

    admin

    Just three!!!
    I admire your self control!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I think I might need help…

    (OMG, do I also have an elipse problem?!!!)
13. 

    March 28, 2012

    Curvin ORielly

    Your excess punctuation bill will arrive in the mail unless you’d prefer to have it charged to a major credit card. Send me your account number, expiration date and three-digit number on the back of your card. I’ll take care of everything. If you’d like, I can set up an account for automatic deductions so you won’t have to worry about punctuation charges in the future.
14. 

    March 28, 2012

    admin

    Just three exclamation points, Curvin!!!
    I admire your self control!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Whoa, I think I might need help…

    (OMG, do I also have an elipse problem?!!!)
15. 

    March 28, 2012

    Bill

    Poor Rebecca. “He’s sitting and I’m standing. What’s up with that?”
16. 

    March 28, 2012

    Patrick Scullin

    Bill, she stands for she sins. He no doubt also sins, but perhaps sitting hides his shame.

    I am disgusted by both!