Two With Sticking Power

So many movies live only in the time they take to be projected. They are light, fluffy entertainment that exist only in the moment. When you rise from your seat, they are left behind like the popcorn kernels on the floor. This isn’t a bad thing, these films are just momentary entertainment. Escapism with little … Read more

Surgical Deja Vu

Call me Robo-Man. I’ve got a matching set of these suckers. Three weeks ago, I went under the knife for my fourth hip replacement surgery in five years. Arthritis was the cause for the first two total hip replacements, faulty equipment was the cause for the subsequent “revision” hip surgeries. Seems that the parts they … Read more

Arizona Considers Teaching Arithmetic

The state of Arizona is seriously considering passing a law that would teach its citizens “the mysteries of arithmetic” according to state officials. The state is still counting votes in elections that took place almost two weeks ago. “It’s pretty embarrassing,” said Randy Fomsert, a Maricopa County resident, “I mean, even Florida was able to … Read more

Viewing Deck To Be Added To Fiscal Cliff

As Washington heats up to rattle sabers over the impending drive toward the ‘fiscal cliff’, an ambitious carnival company has begun construction on a viewing deck for the public. “We figure don’t nobody know how far a piece that drop over the edge of the fiscal cliff is,” said F. “Cronk” Tastersall, the owner of … Read more

Elections Over, America Copes

With the 2012 elections finally over, the United States of America rebuilds its psyche. After being pummeled by billions of dollars spent in negative advertising, and endless hours of pundits punditizing endlessly, and millions of promises for happier days ahead if (INSERT CANDIDATE NAME HERE) is elected, a wounded nation now gathers its wits and … Read more