Surprising Details of Manson Nuptials

Maybe someone will get a clean shave for his wedding!
Maybe someone will get a kissin’-smooth shave for his special wedding day!

Convicted mass murderer Charles Manson will soon be walking the last mile to the altar when he marries Afton Elaine Burton, a 26-year-old Midwesterner who has tried for nine years to exonerate him.

The couple plans to marry in February and have released some surprising details about their upcoming wedding.

— The couple’s request to honeymoon in Napa was denied by the warden
— Charlie is writing the vows and claims to have found six new rhymes for the word ‘love’
— The couple is registered at Crate & Barrel, Build-A-Bear and Nordstrom
— Afton said “yes” to the dress after trying on only one gown
— The Beatles song “Helter Skelter” will be the processional song, followed by Bach’s Air (on the G-String), “All Night Long” by Lionel Ritchie and Insane Clown Posse’s “Ghetto Freak Show”
— The couple’s request to honeymoon in Tahiti was denied
— They are in negotiations with NBC for a reality TV show based on the madcap, wacky antics of their marriage
— Their request to have sharp knives as party favors was denied

Be on the lookout for your wedding invitation going out in early December.

Leave a Comment