Month: September 2020

Chris Wallace, the last journalist at Fox News, almost lost his life last night as he moderated the first presidential debate between Donald Trump and Joe Biden. “It was a living hell,” Wallace told The Lint Screen after the ninety minutes of verbal abuse. “Congress needs to get emergency law and order funding before the … Read more

President Donald J. Trump is a man who loves shattering norms. His latest conquest? The American election system. Today the president invited The Lint Screen to The White House and claimed he won the 2020 presidential election “hands down. A tremendous landslide victory.” Asked how that was possible when the election day is not until … Read more

“Ivanka looks great in black,” President Donald Trump tells The Lint Screen. “She’s very sexy in dark colors, so she’s the perfect pick to replace Ginsburg. She’ll look a hell of a lot better in her black robe than Ginsburg did, I can tell you that.” Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, who died last week at … Read more

If it wasn’t for the genius of Q, James Bond would have been dead back when he was a strapping young Sean Connery. Q is the code name for M16’s (British Secret Intelligence Service) top inventor of devious weaponry. And President Donald J. Trump has long been a fan of his work. “I love the … Read more

Russia’s President Vladimir Putin encourages all Americans to rally their support for President Donald J. Trump in 2020. “If Americans want be patriots, they must vote Trump,” Putin tells The Lint Screen. “Donald Trump has done incredible job. He is best president ever. Much better than black Obama.“ Putin has been very impressed by the … Read more

While the fake news media wets itself with glee over Bob Woodward’s new book Rage, the president takes down “this evil enemy of the people.” Woodward released tapes of alleged interviews he did with President Trump back in February. On the tape, one hears the president confessing he knew COVID-19 was deadly, “more deadly than … Read more