PD Scullin

Clarence Thomas grew up poor in Savannah, Georgia. He vowed, “As God is my witness, I’ll never be hungry again,” and hit the jackpot when he passed Senate approval to become an Associate Justice after only one-year judiciary experience. It’s been prime rib, lobster tails, and Chateau Latour Premier Grand Cru ever since. “I had … Read more

Poor Donald J. Trump. The man never got a break. At least that’s what he tells The Lint Screen. “I was born into poverty,” he recalls. “Living on the mean streets of Hell’s Kitchen. I had nothing. I ate rats. Such awful meat– rat meat. Stringy. But I pulled myself up by the bootstraps and … Read more

Looney Lady Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene made a blistering speech at the Turning Point Action Conference recently. She attacked President Joe Biden for “helping people” and “depriving them of the opportunity to pull themselves up by the bootstraps. It’s disgraceful.” Greene, who is rarely tethered to reality, compared Biden to FDR and LBJ. “If you … Read more

Sunny Florida’s dark despot, Gov. Ron DeSantis, is traveling America, making his case for being our next president. He claims his biggest asset is hating. “If someone’s different from me,” DeSantis tells The Lint Screen, “I’ll hate them with the fiery passion of 1,000 hellfires. I’ll take away their rights and freedoms, ban their books, … Read more

Oh, that, Donald! You never know what he’ll do next. After the recent release of an audio tape with the twice-impeached disgraced ex-President, as he showed top secret Iran invasion war plans to visitors, Trump vehemently denies it. “There were no secret plans,” the con man says. “I was showing plans for–– I don’t know–– … Read more