Humor

Various things designed to get you to expel air in an unplanned manner while showing more teeth than you usually do.

Bill Proposed To Arm Prisoners

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Alabama Congressman Hank Tippsmon has introduced “The Behind Bars Protection Act”, a bill designed to curtail violence among the over 2.5 million people incarcerated in America. The revolutionary law is simple in its execution–– every prisoner would be issued a firearm and ammunition for self protection purposes. “Crime is a real problem in America,” explained … Read more

Anguished Woman Lied To Her 893 FB Friends

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Pam Dockwinker is being shunned by humanity following her confession that she recently issued a “Like” on Facebook when it wasn’t true. “I don’t know what I was thinking,” the distraught 22-year old resident of Madison, Wisconsin said. “I have got to be like the worst human being ever.” Yesterday Ms. Dockwinker saw a picture … Read more

The Missing McConaughey Super Bowl Scripts

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This is a scoop so big, it’d bankrupt Baskin Robbins. The Lint Screen has acquired three scripts of TV spots produced by The Lincoln Motor Company using Matthew McConaughey that were supposed to have aired in last Sunday’s Super Bowl Game. The spots were pulled at the last minute due to a prank done by … Read more

Garfield Not to Publish Mohammed Comics

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The world’s most popular cartoon cat, Garfield, will not feature the prophet Mohammed in upcoming comic strips as planned following the tragic slaying of twelve people by religious zealot kooks who can’t take a joke. “After what happened in the Paris offices of satirical magazine ‘Charlie Hebdo’, we just didn’t think it was a good … Read more