Trump Claims He Was Protecting Biden From Hostile Ukraine

President Donald J. Trump melts down with blinding rage when asked about the impeachment investigation of him recently launched by Congressional Democrats. “It’s very unfair,” Trump told The Lint Screen. “Adam Schiff, ‘Shifty Shiff’ I call him, should recuse himself because he’s a suspected murderer, pedophile, kidnapper, and bank robber. A very bad man. It’s … Read more

The Dynamic Duo Disputes “Insane” Whistleblower Claims

Batman and Robin, Abbott and Costello, Lime JELL-O and mini-marshmallows–– those famous pairs have got nothing on Trump and Giuliani. Today the besieged men called The Lint Screen to discuss the allegations last week of an anonymous whistleblower accusing the men of working with a foreign government to influence an American election. DT: The crazy … Read more

Rudy Presents His Defense For Trump Against Impeachment

If Perry Mason, Matlock, Jack McCoy, and Ally McBeal had a baby, that child would still look like a legal moron compared to Rudi Giuliani. Donald J. Trump’s personal attorney visited The Lint Screen offices and laid out his bulletproof defense strategy against “the looney libs hellbent on destroying America with their unfounded witch hunt against our … Read more

McConnell Outraged At Dems For Investigating Trump

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell is fed up with his compatriots on the other side of the aisle. “The Democrats are unpatriotic,” the ex-model of gold bling necklaces told The Lint Screen. “No matter what the president does, they think it’s against the law.” The latest kerfluffle concerns a whistleblower in the intelligence community who … Read more

Dems Are “Fixing To Get Pretty Upset” About Trump

The beautiful thing about our democratic system of government is checks and balances. The executive, legislative, and judicial branches check and balance each other for a balanced stew of delicious democracy. Um, um, stew! But many in the Democratic Party think President Trump and the GOP are abusing their power. “President Trump and Mitch McConnell … Read more