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Rubio claims Black Lives Matter and Meryl Streep responsible for Capitol attack
Pity poor “Little Marco” Rubio. As many Republican politicians vie to curry favor with their master, twice impeached disgraced ex-president Donald J. Trump, Rubio has gotten lost in the shuffle of crazy conspiracy theorists. No more! Today Rubio told The Lint Screen about his latest accusation about the January 6 insurrection at the Capitol. “Some…
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GOP Zealots praise their golden god, “Thou shalt have no other gods before Me”
The Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) has kicked off, and America had better get ready to feel the love of true Trumpers. CPAC is known as the Lollapalooza of the lunatic fringe, where rabid Republicans gather like moths to a flame and worship their god, disgraced former President Donald J. Trump, who they believe to…
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Gaetz blames Ted Cruz’s daughters for insurrection, “They must be grounded”
Today’s ‘Florida man’ news story is a doozy. Florida’s Republican Congressional Representative Matt Gatez told The Lint Screen the insurrection on January 6 at the U.S. Capitol was the direct result of Ted Cruz’s twelve and ten-year-old daughters. “Those girls are born troublemakers,” the righteous politician claims. “They forced poor Senator Cruz to take an…
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Johnson claims Antifa, illegals, and actors were behind Capitol invasion
Wisconsin Republican Sen. Ron Johnson should not be around sharp objects. He could hurt himself. The unhinged looney spun his ridiculous conspiracy theories yesterday at the first public Senate hearing about the Capitol attack on January 6. “I’m sick and tired of people blaming supporters of President Trump,” Johnson told The Lint Screen. “I wanted…
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“Texans don’t need power or clean water,” Perry says, “we like the free market”
Former Texas Governor Rick Perry says he knows his people “like the back of my hand,” as he points to his open palm. “And Texans are tough, they don’t need no handouts from nobody.” Perry, who ran the Energy Department in the Trump administration (even though he didn’t know what it did), believes too many…
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“My awful kids forced me into a Cancun vacation,” Cruz says
Caroline and Catherine Cruz may be children, but that doesn’t give them a license to force their father into politically sticky situations! Texas Senator Ted Cruz told The Lint Screen his two “awful daughters” are responsible for his ill-timed family vacation in Cancun, Mexico. “I wanted to stay in Houston,” Cruz claims. “I was going…
