Ebola Gets All Cuddly

Seeing the success ISIS has had since re-branding itself and making terrorism more approachable, the deadly disease Ebola has engaged its own public relations firm, award-winning Jennings, Marlowe, Everbrite Public Relations in Manhattan to address “softening our image” according to an anonymous Ebola spokesman. “People misunderstand Ebola,” said the seven-foot tall spokesman, wearing a black … Read more

Lawyers Ruin Everything; Lint Gives Up

Give people an inch, and they’ll sue you. The Lint Screen recently made the generous offer to provide free urine testing over the internet, and rather than be heaped with praise, our offices have been heaped with lawsuits from shills in shiny suits representing pissed people claiming that they have urine-stained and broken computer keyboards. … Read more