Willis Hargrain, a 55-year old resident of Anderson, South Carolina, was charged today in the death of his neighbor, J. Mundy Catwalls on July 1.
Hargrain, asked Catwalls, age 58, if it was “Hot enough for ya?” on a sweltering 106-degree day. Catwalls convulsed with laughter, literally laughing himself to death. Local law enforcement immediately began an exhaustive investigation of the incident.
“We believe we have a rock solid case against Mr. Hargrain,” Det. Franklin T. Woolty told reporters. “Our C.S.I. evidence shows that Hargrain had been developing this lethal ironic joke for years in his tool shed. So it was definitely premeditated ironic humor murder. We found scraps of paper with early formulations of the joke like ‘Is the climate suitable for you?’ ‘How about this heat? It really is something, isn’t it?’ and ‘Boy howdy, it’s hot. How hot is it? Hmmm, I wish I had a witty retort, but afraid I don’t…’”
Officials believe Hargrain continued developing the ironic joke until he had perfected it with the terse “Hot enough for ya?” then waited for the ideal time to inflict it on his neighbor. The 106-degree day provided the perfect climate for this ironic humor killer. Obviously, Hargrain is a threat to society at large with this razor wit that can slash a jugular vein and a funny bone.”
Hargrain was taken into custody and has been refused bail.