An Insider Peek @ Casting Specs

Part of our mission at The Lint Screen is to illuminate the mysterious corners of life and make the truth cover its privates. With that in mind, below are some casting specifications intercepted for an upcoming film production. The Professor: His name is Charles Humbecker, his close friends call him “Charles” or “Ester.” He’s the … Read more

New Weapon Unleashed In War on Terror

U.S. intelligence officials announced today they are “fighting terror with sorrow” by deploying Smookie The Sad Kitten on known terrorist websites. “We’ve been working on the technology under wraps for years,” John Smith (not his real name, it’s an alias for Chuck Windowbee of Arlington, Virginia) told The Lint Screen. “We decided it was time … Read more

Woman Goes Totally Berserk After Candy Crush Dis

Sandy Minkertom is mad, and you don’t want that! The 36-year old Philadelphia insurance broker recently took drastic violent action by de-friending 812 people on Facebook after they did not accept her invitation to play the popular game Candy Crush. “I couldn’t believe it,” said the upset Candy Crusher. “Here I was being a great … Read more

Patriot Demands 322.2 Million Be Deported

Into the hub-bub surrounding the immigration brouhaha enters Edward Fletcher, a 67-year-old Boston native and direct descendant of Moses Fletcher, a passenger on the Mayflower bringing pilgrims to America in 1620. Mr. Fletcher has “had his fill of the silly jabberwocky” about immigration reform. “As far as I’m concerned,” the tall Yankee told The Lint … Read more

Best Buy Selling Weapons for Black Friday Shoppers

Best Buy just announced its big Black Friday Savingspalooza will begin at 5:00 pm on Thanksgiving Day, and to make the event more festive, the retailer will be selling guns and knives in store parking lots. “We are going to have some incredible deals,” said Justin Sindycox, Director of Pleasant Customer Experiences told The Lint … Read more