Plan Unveiled To Bolster U.S. Economy

A leading economic advisor, Dr. Geoffrey K. Rumdeedumdeedum, has proposed a bold plan he says will goose the economic doldrums the United States economy has been experiencing. “We need to finally recognize Monopoly money as legal tender,” says the man who describes himself as a distinguished economist from his home behind a dumpster in an … Read more

Lawmakers Take Vacation From Nation Ruination

Congressional personnel are exiting Washington quickly to enjoy their long summer vacations. “We’re exhausted,” said one Congressman. “Doing nothing good is awfully tiring work.” While no politician wanted to be quoted on record, all who spoke with The Lint Screen admitted that they were tuckered-out from grandstanding and being sycophantic servants to their lobbyist overlords … Read more