Things are heating up in Washington as Republican politicians are balling their fists and looking for someone to slug.
“It’s getting out of hand,” Sen. Bernie Sanders tells The Lint Screen. “These GOP politicians are talking smack and pushing buttons and boundaries. We can’t have it anymore, so we’ll take their beefs to the canvas and let them settle it with the pugilistic arts.”
Sanders will host the upcoming “Thunda In The Rotunda” Fights.
“We’ve got quite a card,” the Vermont Senator says. “The undercard includes ‘Murderin’ Mauler’ Markwayne Mullin squaring off against ‘Slammin’ Sledgehammer’ Sean O’Brien. These guys have tried to settle their score with nasty Tweets, and now they will negotiate their differences with fisticuffs. But that’s just the appetizer, baby.”
Bernie smiles.
“We’ll host a battle to the death everyone’s dreamed about,” Bernie beams. “We’ve got ‘Manglin” Marjorie Taylor-Greene bumping gloves with ‘Loonie’ Lauren Boebert. These two gals hate each other, and they will finally settle the score. It’s going to get real ugly real fast.”
Sanders chuckles with a mischievous gleam filling his eyes.
“Then we’ve got the main event, which will be one for the ages,” Bernie boasts. “‘Krazy Killer’ Kevin McCarthy versus ‘Terminator’ Tim Burchett. These guys have been itching to settle their score, and by God, it will be an epic battle to determine who rules MAGA Nation once and for all.”
Bernie takes a deep breath. “There are no losers with the Thunda in The Rotunda,” he claims. “In the end, America is the winner.”
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Read PD Scullin’s debut novel “SAWDUST: Love is wilder than a circus,” a twisted, fun ride across America with a traveling circus in the early 1980s. Also available in audiobook. Buckle up and go.