Informed points of view you might agree with or throw stones at. All’s I’m sayin is…
Have you heard or seen this turd in the bathwater from Mountain Dew? Click and catch it from Ad Age.
This is yet another example of what happens when brands try to be edgy by giving themselves over to popular figures and hoping to ride a social media wave.
Well, Mountain Dew, sometimes that wave drowns you. And you deserve every bit of the bad press and ill will it created.
As many fools proclaim the death of TV spots, here is a sampling of classic commercials for all time selected by Mark Andrews with m-a-d-e in London.
Click here, little darling and prepare to enjoy the wonders of brilliant concepts that are well-written, art directed, directed and produced.
The Lint Screen cribbed this gem from that magnificent bastard who speaks unvarnished truth about the advertising biz (such as it is), George Parker of AdScam fame. Thanks, George, for spotlighting this great post.
Enjoy–– these desert island picks by Mr. Andrews are some mighty fine cheese.
Following the sensation caused by the popularity of the Dodge Ram Truck Super Bowl Spot last week, the entire ad industry is abuzz trying to find the commercial’s copywriter and voice talent named Paul Harvey.
“I never heard of the guy,” said one unnamed advertising headhunter, “but I’d sure like to get a piece of this Paul Harvey character. I’ll bet I could get him into Wieden, Crispen, Goodby– you name it! This Harvey kid threw the long ball, and the first recruiter to get him is going to get a handsome payday!”
Others are excited to find Harvey for his vocal skills. “Sure, it was a nice tone poem, kid’s got some writing chops for sure,” said one agency executive, “but it was his voice that was so captivating. The guy dripped of sincerity, humanity, all that warm touchie-feelie crap, that’s money in the bank. Harvey could be the next Hal Riney, I think!”
To date, efforts to discover Paul Harvey have failed. “The guy is doing the smart thing,” said an east coast headhunter. “Slow play the hand and let the pot keep getting bigger. This Paul Harvey is nobody’s fool!”
Anyone who knows the whereabouts of Paul Harvey should contact The Lint Screen so that we may put him in touch with the proper authorities and maybe enjoy a taste of the action.
The NFL runs a thanks to its fans as real live players show up at their home. Hell, they even clean a driveway and like doing it, proving that head injuries cause brain damage.
Blackberry pimps its new phone with a special effects hoo-haw that makes the point that the phone does all kinds of stuff. Well, uh, O.K., I guess.
eTrade baby talks again. Not so cute anymore. Grow up already.
Bud Light has spots on their ‘only weird if it doesn’t work’ campaign, an idea they borrowed from “SportsCenter” way back when. These spots show sports superstitions played with Big Easy voodoo and black magic. A sixer of BL gains one access to this great power granted by Stevie Wonder! Wow-wee! Not great moments in advertising.
The Niners look lame. The lights go out in N.O. What’s going on here? Geez, are these commercials that bad?
Subway wastes buckets of money hiring various celebs telling us that “February” is hard to say and that Subway is selling subs. Thanks for the update, bun breath.
Axe Apollo introduces itself with a drowning beauty, a hungry shark and a hunky lifeguard, oh, and some guy in an astronaut outfit. Uh, long way to go for product recognition, but I guess it works.
Kia Forte shows product at car show. A nerd paws the car and cybernetic hotties toss him like a rag doll. Hey, that’s a good looking car!
Something called Gildan tee shirts advertises. Hmmm, maybe I’ll wear one with my Calvin Klein underwear.
Tracy Morgan for Mio Fit. No thanks.
Psy won’t die. The obnoxious Korean pop sensation shows us his gangham style moves cracking pistachios. Nutcracker suite? Will Psy’s 15 minutes of fame ever be up? Please!!!
Lincoln yaks about some social media dealio with Jimmy Fallon and I’m supposed to care and get on the internet to check it out and I don’t think I could care any less about this so I don’t think I will.
Speed Stick has a spot with a guy holding some panties. I’m starting to re-think my Calvin Kleins.
Is black the new beer color? Beck’s brings us Beck’s Sapphire with a singing fish. Dumb.
Budweiser goes for the heartstring long bomb with a tale of the man who raises a Clydesdale foal, it grows up and the beer company comes for its hooved asset, the man three years later goes to see the Clydies in Chicago. He is sad, but wait, the Clydesdale breaks free and runs down the street and the two embrace. Did anyone on the creative team see Equus?
What’s this year’s “Halftime in America” spot? The new one for Dodge Ram. A brilliant spot that uses the voice of Paul Harvey reading a tone poem he wrote to farmers–– matched with beautiful images honoring the American farmer. It’s a terrific spot with a great end line: “Dodge Ram: For the farmer in all of us.” And damn if Dodge Ram doesn’t just fit the bill beautifully. Great spot. Fresh, riveting. End zone dance.
Kia blows a wad of dough to answer a kid asking his parents “Where do babies come from?” Not worth going into what happens. Oh, yeah, I guess they’re in a Kia vehicle, at least I think so. I remember a panda bear and babies parachuting and the song “And the wheels on the bus..”
Tide has a great spot about a miracle “Montana Stain” and the sensation is causes. One of the best spots of night.
Mercedes CLA introduces itself in style with Willem Dafoe as the devil and the Rolling Stones singing for his sympathy and a young man imagining ruling the world from behind the wheel of this car– but hey, look at the low price, kiddo! Keep your soul, take out a bank loan. Oh wait, that’s selling your soul, too. Bring back that devil…
Paul Rudd and Seth Rogen appear in a Samsung “Next big thing” spot with Bob Odenkirk and LeBron James. Lots of big money star power, some good lines but hardly as arresting or as smart as the campaign spoofing iGeeks waiting outside Apple stores.
Ravens win. That’s it. Goodnight.
Not going to review every damn spot. Too much work. Actually want to see this game, so The Lint Screen is going to spotlight most of them, but not all.
Another caveat: haven’t seen any of these spots beforehand, with the exception of the Doritos “Goat” spot (oops!). Didn’t want to get caught up in the hype. Want to see the spots with virgin eyes, in the context of commercial clutter.
Before we get started, Alicia Keys nailed “The Star Spangled Banner”–– amazing. That girl is on fire.
Budweiser introduces some new beer called Black Crown with a spot that has a bunch of hipsters dressed in black and they cheer a new beer for them. Kiss that $4 million goodbye. Pitiful.
Audi has an interesting tale of a guy who goes stag to the prom in his old man’s Audi. It gives him ballsy bravery to park in the principal’s spot and kiss the beautiful prom queen. He drives home with a black eye, and hollers happily. Nice.
Hyundai Sante Fe has a cool spot with a kid getting bullied and rounding up a team of brave compadres to challenge the punks. Engaging and good.
Go Daddy braves new territory by not showing exclusive T&A. No, now they have a fat geek French kissing a beauty. I believe there was supposed to be a strategic reason for this. Something about beauty and brains. Huh?
Pepsi Next has a spot that is awful. Next.
Best Buy gets Amy Poehler and makes her recite an unfunny script. Not a great buy of talent.
Budweiser Black Crown has an obnoxious spot showing the type of obnoxious creeps who’ll drink this stuff. Goth hipsters? No thanks.
Oreos has a terrific spot using the time honored strategy of people arguing on favorite attribute of product. “Cookie” or “Cream”– but this thing is ph-resh with the debate taking place in a library, getting hyper violent but always arguing in whispers. Oh, Weiden & Kennedy, you guys kick super ass. Great spot.
Toyota Rav 4 gives us a genie who misunderstands wishes and a whacky family asking for all sorts of things. It’s a wild ride that tries awfully hard with lots of special effects and overshadows the product. One can almost smell the flop sweat the creatives had trying to score on this.
Doritos has a spot with guys dressing like princesses because the daughter of one of them has a bag od Doritos. Ah, the “Goat” spot is better than this. To repeat, Goat trumps princess. Onward.
Calvin Klein delivers more packages than UPS in a spot showing super fit dudes sporting their guchies. I feel so fat.
Go Daddy has another spot with some strategy and it’s a mess.
Milk has a nice spot with The Rock as he pursues a gallon of moo-juice before saving the world. Hardly a classic in the “Got Milk” campaign, but not bad.
Hyundai has a great spot for Turbo Sonata as it follows all sorts of awful vehicle– everything from nuclear weapons to dripping chemicals to drooling dogs–– then zips past them because “It’s better to be in front.” Very nice.
VW hits the long ball with its Minnesotan businessman who has a happy Jamaican accent and spreads his good cheer. O.K., the fit with VW Beetle is forced, would have been better for Red Stripe, but it’s a memorable spot. Also, best Super Bowl use of a Partridge Family song.
Taco Bell has a hateful spot with old people escaping their retirement home to party and get tatted and raise holy hell. But, the old coots obviously have a death wish– ending their night eating Taco Bell food.
Lincoln has stove pipe hatted 16th prez pimping its sheet metal. Illegal use of political icons.
As the media blitz rages for upcoming Super Bowl commercials, The Lint Screen looks back at history’s most famous and loved big game commercial, Apple’s legendary “1984” spot that announced the introduction of the MacIntosh computer.
Here are some little known facts about this classic spot.
1. Steve Jobs invented television enabling the airing of the commercial.
2. Originally, the rebel in red shorts running with a sledgehammer was cast to be Mean Joe Green, an effort to milk his famous Coca-Cola “Towel” commercial that aired in the 1980 Super Bowl. The deal fell through when Apple officials would not give in to Green’s demands that the sledgehammer be replaced with a ball-peen hammer “because that big old sledgehammer is way too heavy.”
3. The actor playing the Big Brother-like character on the large screen was George Lindsey, better known for his portrayal of “Goober” in “The Andy Griffith Show.”
4. The rough cut of the commercial used the original name for the MacIntosh computer–– “Revolutionary-Magic-Box-For-Computation-Tasks.”
5. Ridley Scott, the director of the commercial, shot it in one take on location at an Elks Lodge in Paramus, New Jersey.
6. Believe it or not, there were no M&M’s on the craft services table during production.
7. The original script had the following announcer copy: “On January 24th, Apple Computer will introduce Macintosh… and you’ll see why we don’t think George Orwell was such a great author after all.”
8. The crowd of people seated watching the projection of Big Brother thought they going to see a preview episode of “Family Ties.” Their dour expressions reflect their disappointment.
9. The spot was originally finished with a soundtrack of a barbershop quartet singing “Everything’s Coming Up Roses” from the Broadway musical “Gypsy.” It was edited out at the last minute.