The Lint Screen, Satire/Humor/Etc.
"Where fake news gets real."
Various things designed to get you to expel air in an unplanned manner while showing more teeth than you usually do.
Local and state law enforcement officials have begun a massive manhunt for Willis Hargrain, the 55-year old suspect in the ironic humor death of J. Mundy Catwalls, who escaped from the Anderson jail following his incarceration on July 8. Hargrain used his razor sharp wit to cut down a policeman in the line of duty. … Read more
Willis Hargrain, a 55-year old resident of Anderson, South Carolina, was charged today in the death of his neighbor, J. Mundy Catwalls on July 1. Hargrain, asked Catwalls, age 58, if it was “Hot enough for ya?” on a sweltering 106-degree day. Catwalls convulsed with laughter, literally laughing himself to death. Local law enforcement immediately … Read more
As record high temperatures gripped many states across the country, a 58-year old South Carolinian died responding to an ironic joke. Law enforcement officials report that J. Mundy Catwalls of Anderson, South Carolina, died today when a neighbor, Willis Hargrain, saw him clipping his front hedges in 106-degree heat and asked, “Hot enough for ya?” … Read more
The new movie LBJ: Werewolf Killer opened this past weekend with an astounding $1.2 billion in worldwide ticket sales. The movie is based on Robert Caro’s 2008 bestseller Ascent to Hairy & Vicious Fangs of Death! While I thought the film was very good, I did question the casting of Peter Dinklage as LBJ. He … Read more
Tragedy struck the nonhuman presidential campaign today as the winner of the Iowa primaries, Bag o’ Fritos, was eaten to death. The salty snack was scheduled to give a speech in Akron, Ohio, when a young man rushed the stage, ripped open the candidate’s skin and quickly ate his deliciously addictive innerds. The assasin was … Read more
As expected, Big Ol’ Slab o’ Granite, the New Hampshire primary winner in the nonhuman presidential race, has announced that it is withdrawing from consideration. The candidate announced weeks ago that it was considering thinking about maybe possibly withdrawing from the race. Granite was also recently the target of a savage attack ad created by … Read more