Anchorman Lou Dobbs would take a bullet for disgraced former President Donald J. Trump, but that obedient loyalty couldn’t save him from being fired by Fox Business Channel. “Fox gave me my walking papers,” an upset Dobbs told The Lint Screen. “That’s the thanks I get for giving them the best years of my life. … Read more

Georgia Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene sees monsters in every shadow. And on Groundhog Day, that monster is Punxsutawney Phil. “We must stop celebrating Groundhog Day,” Greene told The Lint Screen. “We can’t allow one rodent in the middle of nowhere Pennsylvania to rule our weather. He’s condemning us to six more weeks of winter. Oh, … Read more

The world of investigative journalism was rocked by The Lint Screen when it obtained an exclusive recording of the conversation between House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy and twice impeached former president Donald J. Trump. A reporter disguised as a Mar A Lago waiter planted a recording device in the room where the power brokers met. … Read more

While Americans are engaged in a fierce battle with COVID-19, Republican politicians are grappling with a rare spinal disease called Jellyboneitis, a mysterious affliction that causes a complete failure of the spine. Minority Leader Mitch McConnell slithered to the microphone, was hung up on a coat rack, and spoke to reporters. “Three weeks ago I … Read more

Lame duck Donald Trump is planning the final day of his presidency which he will begrudgingly relinquish to Joe Biden on Wednesday, January 20th at 12:01 p.m. The twice impeached president has been working closely with his vivacious daughter Ivanka Trump and her weenie of a hubby Jared Kushner in making plans for a grand … Read more

Today President Donald J. Trump made history as he became the first president in U.S. history to be impeached twice. “It’s an incredible achievement,” Trump told the The Lint Screen. “No one has ever seen a worse president than me. My first impeachment was for extorting a foreign government for dirt on a political opponent, … Read more