The Lint Screen, Satire/Humor/Etc.
"Where fake news gets real."
Various things designed to get you to expel air in an unplanned manner while showing more teeth than you usually do.
Chez Yummi in Burlington, Vermont is the sort of food joint locals love, but yesterday, instead of serving hot plates of deliciousness, cold tragedy was served. And it was yucky! (Note to The Pulitzer Prize Selection Committee: The Lint Screen’s writing is lean and muscular!) Restaurant patron Fred Vownem was with his wife, Margaret. He … Read more
As he enters the last quarter of what some opponents call his “reign of terror”, President Barack Obama now draws intense criticism for his pardoning of two 48-pound turkeys from Ohio named Mac and Cheese. Although the presidential pardoning of turkeys is a tradition dating back to George H.W. Bush in 1989, Rep. Willie Gromorp … Read more
Convicted mass murderer Charles Manson will soon be walking the last mile to the altar when he marries Afton Elaine Burton, a 26-year-old Midwesterner who has tried for nine years to exonerate him. The couple plans to marry in February and have released some surprising details about their upcoming wedding. — The couple’s request to … Read more
In part five of The Lint Screen’s series examining the underbelly of the mannequin world, we give the floor to Epion (ES) and Pashi Salionne (PS), sisters who work the window of an exclusive Madison Avenue fashion palace. ES: Most days are agony. PS: Agony is a good day. ES: Say something original, why don’t … Read more
Democrats running in the midterm elections have been treating President Barack Obama like toxic waste for some time, now his popularity cooties have spread to his offspring. An anonymous White House sources says that both Malia and Sasha Obama are distancing themselves from their father. “They think he’s a nice guy and everything, but they … Read more
Seeing the success ISIS has had since re-branding itself and making terrorism more approachable, the deadly disease Ebola has engaged its own public relations firm, award-winning Jennings, Marlowe, Everbrite Public Relations in Manhattan to address “softening our image” according to an anonymous Ebola spokesman. “People misunderstand Ebola,” said the seven-foot tall spokesman, wearing a black … Read more