The Lint Screen, Satire/Humor/Etc.
"Where fake news gets real."
Various things designed to get you to expel air in an unplanned manner while showing more teeth than you usually do.
I have prepared this inspirational talk in case I am asked to give the commencement address to the 2010 graduating class of Harvard University… When I was your age, I thought the world was mine for the taking. I was going to go forth and seize the day, seize the week, the month, the year. … Read more
BP announced today plans to release new BP Fish Sticks in grocery stores. The move, viewed as putting into the practice the saying “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade” has many environmental groups furious. “It’s absolutely unconscionable for BP to do this,” said Roger Pretpopp, head of the Gulf Coast Environmental Protection League. “The … Read more
As evil self-serving politicians go on a witch hunt against Goldman Sachs and other Wall Street financial types, I’ve become worried.
What if the dastardly politicos enact regulations that might curb the free marketeers from earning their paltry hundreds of millions of dollars annually?
Austin, Texas is employing trained monkeys to ‘man’ light poles for keeping law-breaking drivers in line. If a motorist runs a red light, the monkey leaps onto the car and scrambles its way inside the vehicle to gouge the driver’s eyes out and spray the interior with urine.
In a Lint Screen exclusive, we reveal the confrontation that took place in the King household on April 15th when Larry sat waiting at the kitchen table as Shawn entered the house from the garage.
Chester Wheelie of Keene, New Hampshire, is also one angry American. “We answer that census, next thing you know the federal government will be sending radio waves to infect our brains making us gover-zombies, begging to pay more taxes, have more socialist entitlement programs and requesting Fluoride in our drinking water. I ain’t falling for it! You can tell the government to keep their greedy hands off my Social Security and Medicare checks, what’s mine is mine. End of discussion.”