Al-Cowda Threat Level Raised

The nation is girding its collective loins in response to new reports from The National Security Agency that Al-Cowda is posing an serious threat to the United States. The NSA has raised the security threat level from cool ‘n creamy soft amber to hot, radient pink.

Breathless on The Red Carpet

Ohmigod, this is so amazing, I’m seeing more stars than Capt. James Kirk on the bridge of the Starship Enterprise at warp speed 5.4, look over there– J Lo, you go girl– and George Clooney, love you in E.R., and there’s that tall blue lady from Avatar— you were incredible sugar, glad goodness beat evil … Read more

Oh, Lady Liberty!

Why have you brought yourself to this? Standing on the corner, waving a sign to get attention; prostituting freedom to sell income tax services. You join the huddled masses of other mascots: the wiener in a bun, dancing taco dude, the purple gorilla, twirling condo sale sign guy and all the many mascots pimping their … Read more