New Georgia gun laws will eliminate embarrassment caused by snowfall.

New Georgia gun laws will eliminate embarrassment caused by unexpected snowfall.

The state of Georgia is not known for liberalism, so how did its lawmakers pass one of the most liberal gun laws in the nation? The answer is cold.

On January 28, two inches of snow paralyzed the city of Atlanta and its metro area of six million people. The incident, called “Snowpocalypse” made Atlanta a laughingstock for the rest of the country, and the weather caused havoc across the state. Proud Georgia lawmakers were not about to let Mother Nature embarrass them again. They immediately sprung into action.

“We felt helpless,” said Jimmy “Wheedle” Bimkirk, a state representative. “We needed to do something about the hostile weather attacking us. So we decided to pass a law giving folks the opportunity to arm themselves so they could stand and protect themselves.”

Bimkirk explained that the new gun laws allow citizens “to buy and carry weapons darn near anywhere so that they can stand their ground protecting it from snow or anything else they don’t care for. An armed citizenry is the best protection against snowflakes hitting the ground and causing us all kinds of grief. We’ll just shoot them flakes in the air! Die snowflakes, die! Problem solved, easy as pie.”

And so, effective July 1, Georgians can arm themselves for protection against the elements. “We all love Mother Nature,” Bimkirk said, “but sometimes she needs to be put in her place. An armed militia can do that and protect our sacred ground.”