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Rudy Reveals Dirty Secrets Found On Hunter Biden’s Laptop
When Rudy Giuliani isn’t touching himself in front of young women, he is America’s watchdog–– scouring the planet looking for evildoers and busting them. In December 2019, ‘America’s Mayor’ trekked all the way to Ukraine on a very important case. “I heard all these amazing stories about the evil shenanigans perpetrated by Hunter Biden,” Rudy…
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Fauci “Ready To Rip That Orange Clown’s Face Off”
Dr. Anthony Fauci appears to be a mild-mannered world-renowned immunologist, but don’t be fooled. Beneath that petite exterior is a raging maniac with a lightning-quick temper and a bottomless reservoir of rage. The good doctor spoke with The Lint Screen about his feeling for President Trump. “The guy is a grade-A horse’s ass,” Fauci said,…
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Barrett “Unsure” About Freedom of Speech And Other “Alleged Rights”
Judge Amy Coney Barrett is an artful dodger. During her Supreme Court nomination hearings, the legal beagle would not be pinned down by Democrat Senators who wanted to know her judicial views on Obamacare, Roe v Wade, or the upcoming election and the powers of the president to influence its outcome in his favor. “I…
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Trump Wants All Americans To Get COVID-19, “You’ll Never Feel Better”
Millions of Americans sent their thoughts and prayers for President Trump when he tweeted last week that he and his va va va voom First Lady had come down with COVID-19. But you can’t keep a good grifter down! Trump was attended to by a team of medical experts at Walter Reed National Military Medical…
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Fly On Pence’s Head Nabs Netflix Series Deal
A star was born at last night’s Vice Presidential Debate, and it wasn’t V.P. Mike Pence or V.P. candidate Kamala Harris–– it was the fly who made his debut on the stage of Mike Pence’s snow-white skullcap. The fly, who identified itself as Rex, was all the Americans could talk about. Hollywood uber-agent Ari Emanuel…
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Prez Sez He’s 110%: “I kicked COVID’s Ass, I am Superman”
FDR was dead wrong. According to President Donald J. Trump, it’s not fear we have to fear, but fear of coronavirus. The most powerful man in the world tells The Lint Screen, “We have nothing to fear but COVID-19 itself.” Trump discharged himself from Walter Reed National Military Medical Center after he showed a global…