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Angry Democrat Mobs Terrorize Nation, Make Children Cry
It’s even worse than you feared! Sean Hannity, the North Star of Fox News Channel, recently warned viewers that mobs of angry Democrats are out of control and a threat to our nation. Sure enough, the Moses of hair parts was correct! All over America, angry libs are gathering like moths to a tiki torch…
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Trump’s Cheat Sheet for N. Korea Summit
The confidential learning aid the prez will use as he prepares for negotiations.
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Comey’s First Draft of Written Testimony Reveals Literary Talent
“It was a dark and stormy night. Dark as ink in a windowless closet, wet as a drunk underwater. The President invited me to dinner. He said he wanted to invite my whole family, but he suspected there might not be enough ice cream to go around. ‘Screw them,’ he said. ‘Come solo.’
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White House-Approved Media Questions
Following President Donald J. Trump spanking of fake news yesterday, the White House has drafted a list of approved questions for the media to ask in press conferences. “We had to do this,” Jeremy Bostwich, White House senior advisor told The Lint Screen. “Since the fake news is running rampant and not reporting the excellence…
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‘The Situation’ Pondering Political Career
Look out Donald, there’s a creature coming from the sea who may take you down! After witnessing the incredible success Donald J. Trump has had in politics, Mike ‘The Situation’ Sorrentino of Jersey Shore fame is thinking he may campaign to be the next president of these United States. “Hey, why not?” the charismatic mensa…
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Trump Hires Confidence-Boosting Coach
“The Donald is not a very outgoing person,” said Sam Blyminauer, Trump campaign manager. “He feels he needs a guy like Tony Robbins on his team to teach him some tricks of how to boost his ego and self confidence. Tony is a master of helping shy folks like Donald come out of their shells…