Following President Joe Biden’s State of the Union Address, Arkansas Governor Sarah Huckabee Sanders gave a stern and dour official GOP rebuttal. Huckabee Sanders, who used to be the shill press mouthpiece of disgraced twice-impeached ex-President Donald J. Trump, droned on about the misery of American life under Biden.
“It is tragic what has happened to our great nation,” said the gloom queen. “Donald Trump made America great again, and now the country’s in a horrible, awful state because of radical Joe Biden and his woke thugs destroying our democracy. They jailed the patriots who tried to protect our country by storming the Capitol––people who know Donald Trump is our fairly-elected leader put here by God to save us from liberalism. It’s tragic.”
Huckabee Sanders painted an image of a country in shambles.
“The Democrats indoctrinate innocent children, forcing them to crossdress, pick their pronouns, have gender reveal parties at age six, study critical race theory, and burn Bibles,” she declared, shaking her head in disgust. “The woke crowd want to teach children about slavery, which was was just a little misunderstanding––but the liberal loonies want to paint our glorious history in a negative way. Why can’t we let sleeping dogs lie?”
The matron of melancholy blames all the nation’s ills on Biden.
“He and Fauci caused Covid and forced us to get vaccines,” she claimed, “and Biden took us to war against our ally Putin’s Russia, a nation of white Christians who simply want their land back from Ukraine. Now the Democrats are cheering because they will rebuild the infrastructure and bring jobs back to America. What’s wrong with things the way they are? Why do they have to change everything? They are ruining our country––it’s a real hellhole, thanks to Biden.”
Huckabee Sanders ended her rebuttal on a note of optimism.
“The only good news is the life expectancy of Americans is falling,” she said. “So if you’re lucky, you won’t have to endure the pain of Biden’s America much longer.” She smiled. “Goodnight, sleep well!”
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