Citizens Angry Over Census

Chester Wheelie of Keene, New Hampshire, is also one angry American. “We answer that census, next thing you know the federal government will be sending radio waves to infect our brains making us gover-zombies, begging to pay more taxes, have more socialist entitlement programs and requesting Fluoride in our drinking water. I ain’t falling for it! You can tell the government to keep their greedy hands off my Social Security and Medicare checks, what’s mine is mine. End of discussion.”

Easter Bunny Blasts Boy As Socialist

Fortunately for little Frankie Urbeenor, he sleeps on a very absorbent pillow. The child cried torrents last night after his visit to The Easter Bunny at the East Waverly Heights Mall in Port Arthur, Texas.

April Fools Joke Ends Tragically

Pity the poor Nakamura sisters, Mai, Miki and Hina–– they are now orphans thanks to their playful humor!!!!! The three daughters thought it would be a funny April Fools joke to plant a bomb in their parent’s car. Their intent was to stop their father from starting the car, then show both parents their dastardly … Read more

Tiger Picks Jesse For Masters

Many people were not surprised when it was announced that Tiger Woods would play in the upcoming Masters Golf Tournament, but the latest Tiger news may stun the world off its ever-loving spinning axis: Tiger has selected Jesse James as his official ‘Wingman’ during his Augusta stay.

Cute Kitten Wants All

Snowpuff, quite possibly the cutest kitten to ever grace a litter box, has great ambition intertwined with her adorability– she wants to rule the world! And it’s working. People across the globe are selling their possessions and donating their money to Snowpuff.