New Prez Candidate To Announce Soon

Speculation is it could be a ghost (the ghosts of Abe Lincoln, Conway Twitty and Gene Rayburn have been mentioned), an alien or an inanimate object from the broom family. Heavy speculation is a whisk broom, although smart money favors a fireplace broom–– either could be a serious contender.

Non-Human Candidates To Debate

Try as they may, Santy Paws, the adorable puppy, Ms. Pickles, the lovable monkey and Carl The Chameleon, the colorful lizard, cannot get the same media attention granted human presidential candidates. And since the humans are having 1,238 televised debates that they are not allowing non-human candidates to compete in, the ‘critter crew’ is creating … Read more

Goodbye, Cruel World!

At 6 P.M. Eastern Standard Time today, the Rapture will arrive. Those of us who have led a good life of righteousness and obedience to Harold Camping will be whisked up to Heaven for our eternal rewards, while the rest of you are left behind and subjected to five months of God’s pranks–– earthquakes, hurricanes, tornados, aggressive life insurance salespeople, Donald Trump, poo-flinging monkeys and what have you.

Say “Yes!” To Kate’s Wedding Dress

We suspect William’s knees will turn to soft toffee pudding when he catches a good gander at his mate all pretty in pink, ready for a dance and a drink. Terrence Ogden Nigel Cuppenstunce, a noted British fashion designer, says the dress is surprising in a number of ways.

Lonely Cute Kitten On Moon Lost Oilade Job Hunting Swedish Bikini Team With Fab Four X-ray Porn

The statistical analysis department here at The Lint Screen recently issued a 146-page report detailing the most popular key words that have attracted readers to this site. According to the number crunchers, here’s the catnip for curious eyeballs: moon lost Swedish Bikini Team job hunting X-ray porn cute kitten oilade fab four lonely These key … Read more