Russian President Vladimir Putin is walking on air these days.
“I have an American Dream Team,” Putin tells The Lint Screen over a Zoom call. “For years, Russia has worked on infiltrating America and destroying democracy from within. So much time and money was wasted. Then I received the gift of Donald Trump.”
Putin smirks. “I could search the universe and never find a more effective useful idiot,” he brags. “This man is loved by his MAGA people. They believe he is a god. And Trump is surrounded by weak, cowardly GOP politicians who must do what he commands. It is so wonderful. Donald, Mitch, and Michael J. are all-stars for toppling America.”
Putin does a joyful moonwalk across the Kremlin floor.
“The GOP will not support Ukraine and NATO allies,” he says joyfully. “And they will not solve the southern border crisis. Why solve a problem and help Biden? It is better politics to impeach the man who is in charge of the border and did nothing wrong. That is much easier and good politics.”
The Russian leader is giddy. “I could not have wished for better comrades than the GOP,” he laughs. “They make my life easier by helping prove democracies do not work. They even attempted to overthrow free and fair elections. They sow beautiful, beautiful chaos! Thank you, my cherished friends. You are truly enemies of the state. And I love you all greatly.”
Putin blows kisses into the camera as commie fluffer Tucker Carlson enters the Kremlin to bow and scrape for his overlord and master.
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Read PD Scullin’s debut novel “SAWDUST: Love is wilder than a circus,” a twisted, fun ride across America with a traveling circus in the early 1980s. Also available in audiobook. Buckle up and go.
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