Mehmet Oz, the Republican candidate for US Senate in Pennsylvania, recently claimed that he thought the state was on The Atlantic coastline. But rather than admit he doesn’t know dick about The Keystone State, he did what his master, disgraced twice-impeached ex-President Trump, would do. He doubled down on the falsehood. “When I was a kid, I loved … Read more

Republicans are licking their chops in anticipation of a red wave washing over America and sweeping them into control of the House of Representatives and the Senate. “Once we have control of Congress,” Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell tells The Lint Screen, “we can make life better for all Americans.” The floppy-throated man explains that … Read more

Eric Trump, The Trump Organization’s executive vice president of shady operations and price gouging, can’t seem to get his story straight. In 2019, Eric claimed the government saved money when his father, disgraced twice-impeached ex-President Donald J. Trump, stayed at one of their properties. “We give the Secret Service a super sweet deal,” he said … Read more

Sen. Rick Scott of Florida, the chair of the National Republican Senatorial Committee and walking human penis, is coming to Georgia and offering his support and endorsement of mega-MAGA-daddy Hershel Walker, running for the Senate. Walker, who at the latest count has four children he conveniently “forgot” he had, recently denied he paid one of his … Read more

GOP Georgia Senate Candidate Hershel Walker is outraged by the media kerfuffle concerning his paying for a girlfriend’s abortion in 2009. “No one is talking about my generosity,” the ex-football star says. “Lots of guys knock up a lady and take a walk. Not Hershel Walker. I pay for my abortions.” Walker sees no hypocrisy … Read more

Texas Sen. Ted Cruz is a Clydesdale-size horse’s ass, and he does not support the new bill designed to avoid coup attempts like the one on January 6, 2021, by disgraced twice-impeached ex-President Donald J. Trump. The bipartisan Electoral Count Act, which even has the support of curmudgeon Sen. Mitch McConnell, is designed to reinforce … Read more